Happy Black History Month everyone! Black History Month is all about embracing the beautiful black skin that you’re in, and today I am highlighting the remarkable achievements made our black brothas and sistas, and speaking about what black history month means to me.

Black History Month reminds me of just how strong black people all across the diaspora are, and makes me remember all the courageous people that paved the way for me to live the way I do today. Many of these people endured extreme obstacles, and the fact that they were able to endure so much to me is pretty phenomenal. These include the greats such as Malcom X, MLK Jr., Rosa Parks, Medgar Evers, Huey Newton, Maya Angelou, and the list goes on. Without these people and many others, the African American community wouldn’t be where it is today. Through all of these wonderful and courageous people, we learned how to speak for ourselves, how to stand our ground, how to lead, how to write with power, and more. These people “walked it like they talked it.” There are still many issues and problems that need to be worked out, but the progress that our race has achieved is worthy to be honored.

Black History Month to me touches back on one of the five aspects of emerging adulthood, and that is age of identity exploration. With Black History Month being a time where all accomplishments made by African Americans are praised, it also allows people that may be lost in finding their identity a sense of pride. Black History Month as a child taught me that where there are struggles there are also triumphs, that who I am and where I come from is unique, and that overall, we as black people are just dope. Through it all, being black is a part of my identity, and I choose to walk with it in courage, pride, and style. Lastly, for all the men and women that paved the way for me, I give you my greatest thanks.

 “In recognizing the humanity of our fellow beings, we pay ourselves the highest tribute.” 
—Thurgood Marshall, first African American U.S. Supreme Court member

https://parade.com/260134/linzlowe/15-inspiring-quotes-for-black-history-month-freedom-is-never-given/

Hello everyone! With Valentine’s Day coming up I decided to write a blog post about love and romantic relationships, but I wanted to talk specifically about the topic of lock in. This is a concept in behavioral economics known as consumer lock-in. You may be asking, “What is lock in?” Well it is the decreased likelihood to choose a new option once an investment in something has already been made. I’ve known many people who have suffered through this kind of issue, myself included.

I actually got the concept of “love lock-in” from a book I’m currently reading called “The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter- and how to make the most of them now” by Meg Jay, PhD. In her book, she speaks of a client of hers that always jumped from man to man, looking at ANY man who gave her the time of day as the potential “one.” She looked at it as just practice, dress rehearsal. I can honestly say that this was me to a point. Now don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t completely naive to the signs, and I didn’t blindly put all my eggs in one basket, I kept my options open. However, once things between me and a guy started to pick up, I put in 100% faith and effort, and even when things began to fizzle, I still wanted to put in that 100% effort, regardless of whether I got 50%, or even only 1%, back. I figured, “If we already got to this point, why cut the cord now?”

I feel this is a phase that many twenty-somethings/ emerging adults go through at a point. Not all, but a good chunk. It’s perfectly normal and healthy to want a loving, stable relationship with a man or woman that makes you happy. You’ve probably heard this before, but there is POWER in loving your singleness. Here’s how I finally reached that point and broke the lock:

• I realized that some people are not worthy of my space. It became okay to cut people out of my life when all they did was drain and frustrate me.
• I learned that I am precious and valuable, my time is precious and valuable.
• I identified my strengths and made large strides to make my strengths even stronger.
• I looked at my weaknesses and how to strengthen them by using the beauty of self reflection.
• I LEARNED from my past situations. It helped me identify what kind of person I wanted in my life, and who I didn’t want.
• I learned that people act with intention. If someone really wants you, they will go with what their heart desires and find you. There won’t be any smoke and mirrors, or blurred lines.
• Finally, I grew tighter bonds with all my friends, and with friends of the opposite sex. This gave me more insight into how men think, and my perspective was diversified and broadened.

I hope you all learned a little bit about lock in, and hopefully my tips helped any of you who have suffered or are currently suffering from this issue! Remember, break the lock and love your singleness!

Thanks for joining me! My name is Julia, and I am currently a psychology major in my junior year, looking to attend occupational therapy school after graduation to obtain my masters. I am a 20 year old Ghanaian American female, with a sweet, but strong personality. Why have I decided to start a blog? Well, it serves as an outlet that I can use to get my thoughts out and touch on the pretty confusing atmosphere that college brings one into. This includes trying to figure out who you are, what you want to do with your life after college, the stresses you endure during college, and many more. I for sure don’t have everything figured out, but I hope you feel connected to me through my experiences.

Before I continue, I wanted to briefly explain why I decided to title this blog “Emerging Aspirations.” As a 20 year old, I am considered an emerging adult. In fact, anyone between the ages of 18-25 is considered an emerging adult, and per the APA dictionary, we are defined as “young adults who do not have children, do not live in their own home, or do not have sufficient income to become fully independent.” There are five key points by psychologist Jeffrey Arnett that define emerging adulthood, and these points are the age of identity exploration, the age of instability, age of self focus, age of feeling in between, and age of possibilities. I’ll be touching on each of these topics throughout my blog posts!

The “Aspirations” part of my title came from the idea that most of us, aspire to make something of ourselves, we have dreams, and we have many expectations for our future. These include stable careers, marriage, family, and the list goes on.

This blog will also serve as a way to encourage, motivate, inspire, and uplift all. I’m going to be focusing on aspects of mental health and well-being that affect such as self-love, confidence, stress management, independence, and more. I’m really excited to be beginning this journey with you all!

I don’t know what my calling is, but I want to be here for a bigger reason. I strive to be like the greatest people who ever lived. – Will Smith.